Why Community? I Desire. 12 May 2022
How would I desire community? God invites. God gives me the desire. What would I actually desire in a community? I would expect a warm and safe 'place' where I can live, work, serve God and grow. Finally when I am old I desire a place where I can safely die. With loving and caring people around me.
A community is about life. Why is the dying so important? I will be accepted for who I am without having to perform. Without having to be different. All unloving and controlling expectations towards me die with me. When I can't die safely in a community, that community is worthless to me. It does not provide a future which I can trust.
Dying to Self
To become a new person, it is required that the 'old' dies. That is what baptism is about. The old man dies. I receive a new Spirit.
Buddhists as well say that I need to die. I need to give up the right to maintain a 'bad' habit. I need to admit my faulty and destructive thinking. I need to renew my mind.
I desire a place where I can safely admit that some of my behaviors and thoughts are destructive and hindering me. I want to give up the right to disturb others and myself with doing what is not good and not productive. I look for the place where I can be honest and where my fellow community members will not get upset with my (good) desires.
I desire a place where I can open up. I desire a place where I can experiment and make mistakes without being judged. I desire a place where I will be held accountable for my misbehavior (in a respectful way). I desire a place where I can convert together with others towards the purposes of my Redeemer. I desire to cooperate on the establishment of the Kingdom of God.
Jesus, guide me in the safely dying and opening up for Your Spirit. Foster my desire.