I.M. Hideous 3 Mar 2021
God hides himself. The devil hides himself. Angels are hidden. Dangers are hidden.
In what way would I be hideous?
Let's not forget that many nice surprises are hidden as well. Otherwise it would not be a surprise.
Not knowing and hiding are different things. Hiding is intentional. I make effort to hide a few things. By times I get tired from all the hiding.
There are even things which I do not know and which I prefer not to discover. I better do not know.
What and Where?
I like to hide my money in a bank or in a safe. My secrets I hide in my heart. Quite a secure place as well.
As a normal person I like to hide my pride, fear and shame. More damaging is that I fear to acknowledge where I failed and where I have been hurt. I tend to bury my pain. The problem is that with doing so I hinder the healing and learning from what went wrong. I repeat my mistakes and I allow others to hurt me again and again in the same way as they did before.
One special case of hiding is where I take too little risk. Because of a small chance for failure I postpone many important actions. And I miss joy and I lack effectiveness.
I shall preferably know and name what I fear and hide. I want to live. I want to become more effective. I need to take more risks and learn to enjoy doing so. Even about small failures I can smile. Doing nothing is sad and unfulfilling. Of course I do like to hide my emptiness.
Come Holy Spirit, help me to become aware of pain and suffering which needs care. Jesus teach me a responsive life where I move forward courageously. I thank God for day by day new opportunities in life.