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Relationship With God II Aug 29, 2022
My writing yesterday was on the relationship with God. I like to say a few things more about when the relationship hurts.
It is as if God has forgotten me. And as a response, I like to forget Him. I even like to hurt Him. A father should care for his child, being me.
I can't forget the message of the gospel, the good news. Who am I without a hope? And God hopes for my hope. For my hope produces faith. And my faith produces a desire to love.
Do I still care about God? Even when I can't see or experience Him? Does He still care for me, even when he can't hear me? When God is who He is, then He will.
Am I who I am? Or am I dead?
What is God redeeming when He hides himself for me? He trusts me and he tests me.
I am supposed to trust God and I am testing God. How is that? Does God's grace vanish from my life when I can't see or experience Him?
Perhaps I need to trust God and trust that He works more in my life than I can just see. He trusts that I can do a few things.
It is not hard to continue to thank and honor God when things go well in my life.
And when things are not going so well? Is that the time that I can be angry with God? Usually my anger reflects my fear. How on earth could it hurt me to stay calm. That is how God treats me as well. With much patience. For He loves me.
Disappointments are part of an imperfect world. Do they make me a bad person? Can they take any value from my life? As if my life would be very important. More important than other people lives?
The question is thus, whether my life is still valuable when I am disappointed. Yes, it is. And my life's value should not depend on the degree in which I experience God.
When I can't see or experience my beloved ones, my life should still go on. It is far too valuable to abandon.
Jesus, teach me to stand in the time of trouble. Teach me to continue celebrations, especially when I am blinded.
Do I really trust God? Am I really trustworthy?
When I value my relationship with God, I need stories explaining how trusting of God is done by others. I need to be taught how to do the trusting and how to be trustworthy. I guess that the answers are pretty simple. Perhaps, "Stop the confusion and face the fears for a serious time."