I.M. Vulnerable 6 Apr 2022
Assume I am a salesman and I want to sell a product. I only like to invest time in selling to so called 'qualified customers.' Those want my product and who are able to pay the price. Makes sense, not so?
Yesterday I was in a local meeting around a 'conciliar process' in my church. We spoke on community and mission. Quite some suggestions came on the table. It appeared to me that not many - or perhaps none - of the participants even tried to estimate the cost. I agree, we also did not make any measurable statement or target. We acted as a snail. From the safe place of our snail shell we shouted some ideas. But we refused to make ourselves truly vulnerable and accountable. We were not prepared to pay the price.
Being fair, that is not required in a brainstorm session. It is however not a fertile ground to propose ideas while not be willing to do the work and effort. Those being satisfied with the status quo (things as they are now), should speak very careful about change.
Price for Community
I need to leave my snail shell and make myself vulnerable, open, willing, active. I need to build friendship with 'qualified customers'. Not with everybody. I need to accept the other candidates warmly and generously. It means that I need to give up my fear and hate towards them.
I just speak for myself. Yes, I do have fear, hate and mistrust towards various persons. I dislike it. A lot of my struggle comes from feeling an outcast in places where I ought to be friends with the others.
I have made efforts to work on improving those relationships. Presently, I am in a 'community' where I do not learn and where I do not grow.
I seek a place where I will grow. And I am willing to pay the costs.
Holy Spirit, make me courageously, vulnerable, and accountable for the task entrusted to me.