I.M. Ridiculed 16 Nov 2021
Everyone watches me. I feel ridiculed. What did I say wrong?
The hardest is that no-one says a word. They smile quietly and watch me. Later when I am gone they will talk about me.
First I struggle just self. Perhaps people do not think that bad or weird about me. I can explain to one or more how I felt and I can ask what they where thinking. Perhaps they did not ridicule me. It is easier to talk to individuals than to groups.
I still may feel ridiculed after asking. It helps to be specific. I can write down what I believe they are thinking. Would it really be that bad? After all I can't read someone's mind.
What if they really ridiculed me? Sometimes groups of people are simply mean and incidentally violent. Which is not a sign of maturity.
It helps when I stay calm. I could thank them for their opinion and ask if they want to tell more. It is not easy to mock a person who stays calm.
Those people are not my friends.
This might happen more often than openly ridiculing a person. It happens for instance when my (relevant) ideas are rejected and not openly discussed. A group may have decided to ignore me.
Father God, what hurts me is what I think about myself. I ask for healthy beliefs about myself. I want to forgive where I have been ridiculed.