Disappointment Escape 7 June 2020
Dealing with a big loss is called grieving. It usually has three phases:
2) Accepting my loss
3) Considering a different future.
The phases may have a somewhat varying order in time.
When I am not aware of my disappointment I can not even work on it. But my disappointment may still hinder me to work on a different future. I explained two days ago how hidden quiet disappoints may grow.
When I become aware of my disappointment I may feel pain. Learn to befriend the pain. That means to have patience with the pain. Listen to it. Feel it. When I step back into denial, nothing new can happen. I need to accept that I have missed opportunities in my life. I may be jealous with other people. I may be angry. I am human.
I may remember my ineffective, passive or unfriendly behaviour with respect to the good things I did not receive. When I bear responsibility in having missed a chance, I need to admit my own share.
Forgive and Repair
I may need to forgive myself and others. If I did damage to other persons, perhaps I need to make repair. The feelings of guilt will leave me.
Dream and Plan
I shall allow new dreams and better expectations. Of course I need to make some plans and I need to execute those. Otherwise I will afresh disappoint myself.
I need to learn that when I am responsible and made healthy efforts, a failed plan is acceptable. When I am able to make a plan and to execute it usually, then I will experience joy and satisfaction with my life. There still may be disappointments, but I can bear with those. I have dreams, hope and faith.